The Gift of Peace to the Mother I Used To Be
On a lazy summer day, I was alone and relaxing on the beach when I saw the mother I used to be sitting in a chair near mine.
The thunder of her words alerted me to her presence and the high probability that the teenager near her set her off with something he said.
I was too far away to hear the whole conversation, yet I was close enough to recognize the fire in her belly over an important issue.
However, her public display of passion surprised me, but I understood where it was coming from.
In the heat of the moment, I remembered the times sarcasm and cynicism escaped the lips of my children and my reaction was not beautiful.
At the time, I knew it wasn’t my place to speak with the mother who was on fire even though I recognized her as the mother I used to be. But I wish I could’ve had a moment to assure her that her child would grow-up, mature, and eventually lose the sarcasm. And I’d like to reassure her that respect for her authority is coming in the future.
Then I thought about a verse that helped me through some difficult moments. How God's word acted like a balm for my disgruntled soul and my unseasoned speech.
To the mother I used to be, trying to teach your son a lesson on the beach, hear this word:
“Let your gentleness be evident to all. The Lord is near. Do not be anxious about anything, but in every situation, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God. And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard our hearts and minds in Christ Jesus.” (Philippians 4:5-8, NIV)
Take a deep breath and calm your spirit. Speak kindly when you feel under fire. Lovingly express your concerns to your child and find out what’s behind their snarky remark.
“Let your gentleness be evident.”
If I could tell the mother I used to be something, I would tell her not to worry because the time will come when childish things are put away and mature relationships will blossom.
“Do not be anxious.”
If you are the mother I used to be, slip away for a moment. Take a step back from a heated argument, count as high as you must to allow your emotions to level off.
In every situation pray and petition God, because the prayer of a [mother] is powerful and effective.
Throw your cares at God’s feet and let Him carry your load. You won’t be sorry. You will be free to love and free to shower grace on those who test your last nerve.
Remember to be grateful; even in the toughest situation there is something to give thanks for.
"With thanksgiving, present your requests to God."
It may feel impossible to give thanks for anything happening in your world right now. You may be dealing with situations that feel out of your league. You are not alone. And to prove it, God beckons you to be thankful in your situation and to tell Him what you want.
When you do, a powerful sense of peace is your reward.
A peace so deep and unrecognizable that you'll know beyond a doubt it could only come from God Himself.
A peace so strong it soothes your soul and calms the crashing waves.
A peace so tender that your broken heart begins to warm and heal and see things with a renewed perspective.
For the precious mother I used to be: keep standing up for what is right, don’t back down, and speak the truth in love.
View every obstacle, challenge, or trial as a gift from God; see them as an open door for God to use you as an influence in your child’s life.
Be the strong, steady voice that whispers both love and concern.
Without you, your child will wonder what love is. Your child will search for it in ways unimaginable.
Your love and guidance has the power to point them to the Lord. In fact, you may be the only one pointing them to the Lord.
And to anyone who is the mother I used to be: I know what plagues your heart and mind. I know what haunts you and makes you cry. I know what your deepest longing and desires for your child are.
While we wait for our children to settle down, mature, and listen, the mother I used to be is now a mother who is patiently waiting with you, praying for you and your child, and trusting God for anyone who is struggling like the mother I used to be.
Waiting with you,
Susan